Companion #708

How I came to be, by #708

Howdy, the names #708 a.k.a. MILF, it hasn’t always been MILF, but that’s what my friends call me, it was once Scott, but I suppose that’s what happens when you have a Meteor Impaled Lava Face. And I don’t care what my properties say, that liquid coming out of my face in not a broken refrigerant valve, it is definitely Lava.
Well anyway, nicknames tend to stick, and MILF has stuck like glue. I wasn’t always called MILF, please do stop s****ing, otherwise this will be a very long story. As I was saying, this account is a story about how I came to be known as MILF.
I can’t really remember much before the event, I suppose having a rock impaled into your face will do that, but I do remember playing Comp-an-ion. It is one of my favourite games, it’s really nerdy, but still my favourite, I have to give my Comp buddy the name of a chemical element and they have to give me the name of the chemical ions that it can form.
Before the incident, I was a chemical engineer in the ore mines of SOLA-STAR #51. Ore is so important on SOLA-STAR #51; it’s needed to power those mighty fighter ships when they go into a battle called Operation Dawn. I have never seen a battle take place, but watching them take off in those legendary skins is an amazing sight, and I can only imagine how epic those battles are.
Anyway, I was playing with Blackbeard, he´s not really Blackbeard, its Grill Face #1577, but after watching pirates of the Lagoon Nebula, he has become obsessed with them. He painted his grill black and insists of being called Blackbeard.
Blackbeard is my best comp, we worked together on SOLA-STAR #51, but now I cant really see much, there is a rock in place of my face after all, we have now retired to SOLA-STAR #836, it’s a nice star and we can just take it easy and play games.
Blackbeard loves to play “what Comp-am-I-on?” this is where he climbs onto something and I have to guess what he is on, its usually pretty easy to guess as there are only rocks around us, but I like to humour him and I say his favourite place, “The Queen #3572´s Revenge” Blackbeard’s most famous ship.
I personally prefer comp-an-ion, I am a bit geeky, but since the accident, Grill Face, I mean Blackbeard has always been there for me, guiding me, wiping away any seeping lava from my face, it’s the least I can do.

Why was I talking about that? Oh, I remember, I was recounting how I came to be. I was playing comp-an-ion with Blackbeard during a break from the Ore Plant, and I had a flash of inspiration, well it was more than a flash, it was literally a fireball hurtling towards us, but I will get to that in a minute. I thought about playing a trick on Blackbeard, I was about to ask him to give me the ions formed by Helium, but the joke was on him, as Helium is a noble gas and doesn’t make ions. To see his face puzzling over it would have been a sight, but as it turns out, I never got to see his face or any face after that.
SOLA-STAR #51 doesn’t have any asteroid belts, so we don’t often see meteor showers or falling debris, but the problem is that on SOLA-STAR #51, the gravity is 47%, which means that once a meteorite or any space artefact does enter its orbit, there is only one direction it will go, and it will go very quickly. That is what happened, I had a flash of brilliance, which turned out to be a flash of burning hot molten meteorite falling faster than those fighter ships from the Crab Nebula when they go into battle.
Anyway, as you can imagine, being on a star with so much gravity, walking is literally dragging your feet, we aren’t known for walking very quickly on SOLA-STAR #51. The CompAthletes are on SOLA-STAR #1815, at only 21% gravity, they have never lost a race in the CompaWealth Games, and I would hate to live on a SOLA-STAR like #72, at 89% gravity, how could they go anywhere?
There we were, running not really a possibility, and a lava-spewing fireball tumbling towards us, the odds were not looking good, well for me anyway. Blackbeard had it slightly easier, he was sitting on a rock or according to him The Queen #3572´s Revenge that was shadowed by a small cliff face, but for me, the only protection I had were my hands, turns out they don’t help very much when faced against flying rocks of lava.

While my life flashed before my eyes, my future nickname plunged towards me. I could see it all, my future wife #3060, she is so dreamy, she doesn’t know that we’re going to get married, she doesn’t even know who I am, she only likes damaged companions, well maybe I am damaged enough for her now. I could see our CompBabies #1548 and #1965, only partially broken, but just as adorable… and that was it, that was pretty much everything I saw, it was surprisingly short, but it flashed before my eyes all the same.
It all became a blur, Blackbeard was unable to do anything but shout “attention on your starboard”, which didn’t really help very much especially as I don’t know what or where starboard is.
As it got closer, it got bigger and hotter, I could literally feel it before it impaled itself into my face, but when it did; I felt nothing! Nothing at all! Surprised? Me too!
Everything went black and the next thing I knew; I was waking up in the infirmary with my face all bandaged up just like #2186 and feeling strangely heavy.
The CompaMedics told me what had happened and that the reinforced plating I had installed from a prior Compa-Cricket accident I had many Sola-Moons ago, had absorbed the impact and had saved enough of my circuitry to keep me alive, but removing the meteor would be fatal, as it had severed but simultaneously sealed my vital hose and pipe work.
So, here I am, that is pretty much how I came to be. I suppose it could have been worse, it has definitely increased my rarity and it has even made me more attractive! According to some lovely Companions in the Helix Nebula, I have become a MILF, a coMpanion I’d Like to share reFrigerants with.
What were you thinking? I said my friends called me Meteor Impaled Lava Face ;-)

Amendment. In page 1: s****ing is sn.ig.gering, like giggling or laughing. I dont know why it is starred out.